Beauty pageantMr SGC
by spacemonkeylover
Summary: Second in the beauty pageant series. Who will be king of the SGC...


Disclaimer: Same old, same old...  
  
Authors note: This is the second in the beauty pageant series- you don't have to read them in order because they don't relate to each other.  
  
Beauty pageant-Mr SGC.  
  
"No."  
  
"Why not?"  
  
"No."  
  
"It's just a bit of fun."  
  
"No way, I am never entering a beauty contest!"  
  
"General Hammond has ordered you Sir."  
  
"Carter, I am not now nor will I ever enter a beauty contest. Is that clear?"  
  
"But Sir, Daniel and Teal'c have been entered..."  
  
"Do you understand Major?"  
  
"If you really want Makepeace to win and be champion of the SGC then that's fine by me." Major Samantha Carter said over her shoulder as she walked out of the Colonel's office.  
  
"No way is that ugly son of a *cough* going to win." He shouted after her.  
  
"But Sir, the bets are going that he will win and Daniel will come close second." She smirked and walked down the corridor.  
  
"And so we reach the final stage of the first annual SGC beauty pageant. With five contestants left to battle it out to be the first ever Miss SGC...Sorry guys, Mr SGC." Janet Fraiser laughed.  
  
"I am so not doing this again next year." Colonel O'Neill whispered to the guy standing next to him, one Dr Daniel Jackson.  
  
"Yeah me neither." He whispered back.  
  
The final five men were standing in a line on the gate room ramp, the female members of the SGC were all giggling at the site of them shivering in their boxer shorts. The men who hadn't taken part and the men who had been knocked out were sitting in chairs behind the women jeering at the last contestants.  
  
"We have seen all their talents, and yes ladies it is cold in here so give the guys a brake! Oh sorry, not those talents. Let us recap; first up we had Colonel Jack O'Neill, 40 odd male from Chicago, has a wood cabin in Minnesota and is team leader of SG1. Jack showed us his yoyo skills while eating a bowl of fruit loops, very impressive Colonel. Next up was Dr. Daniel Jackson, the SGC's resident archaeologist and linguist. Daniel is a 30 odd male who has died several times, but always seems to come crawling back. I'm not quite sure what Daniels talent was supposed to be, but whatever it was he ended up flat on his face yet again; bless him. The third finalist is none other than SG1's Teal'c, 90 odd, he looks great for his age, has a son named Ray'ac and is the ex-first prime to Apophis. Teal'c's specialist talent was ballet, which he was surprisingly good at. Next up was Colonel Makepeace, team leader of SG3, 40 odd and he doesn't get on with Air Force officers." Lots of boos and hisses filled the room, apart from the rest of his team who were cheering.  
  
"Could someone please put those dang snakes back in their cage?" Shouted Colonel O'Neill.  
  
An SF proceeded to collect the snakes that were making their way towards the ramp as Dr. Fraiser continued.  
  
"Colonel Makepeace's talent was catching and killing snakes with his feet, very, um, interesting."  
  
"Blummin' deranged if you ask me." Jack whispered to Daniel who snorted.  
  
"And last, but not least, finalist number five is Major Ferretti, or he would be if he wasn't bitten by one of the snakes." She gave Makepeace a look that said 'I-am-going-to-use-the-biggest-needle-I-can-find-in-your- next-physical'. The Colonel gulped and tried to put on a brave face.  
  
A young female nurse gave Janet an envelope.  
  
"The third runner up is..." She opened the envelope. "Colonel Makepeace."  
  
Claps and cheers, claps and cheers.  
  
"The second runner up is...Teal'c." Teal'c bowed his head and went to collect his clothes left by Sam.  
  
More claps and more cheers.  
  
"The first runner up, who will take the winners place if anything should happen, and with their reputation it probably will...is Colonel O'Neill. Congratulations Daniel!"  
  
The room was engulfed with claps and cheers and wolf whistles.  
  
Jack clapped Daniel on the back as he was crowned. "Well done King Space Monkey."  
  
After the crowed had dispersed, King Daniel and Jack were left on their own.  
  
"Uh, Jack?"  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Clothes?"  
  
"Sam had th...I am so gonna kill her!"  
  
As the employees of the SGC went about their work in the quite facility, two blurs could be seen running through the corridors swearing and cursing the name of Sam Carter.  
  
The End.  
  
Thanks for the reviews in the other beauty pageant story, please review this one. Criticisms are welcome, although nice things would be...um...nice. 


End file.
